Smazeny Syr - God's Gift To the Czechcs

◊ I know that for months now I have been talking up Czech beer. It is not even on a level of quality with anything I would associate with beer. I simply use the Czech word now, pivo. There are other foods that they are masters of though. At first this did not seem to be the case. It has been said before and I will say it again. CZECH FOOD IS BLAND BEYOND WORDS. Their version of spicy food usually just ends up tasting like tomato soup. I alsmost went into shock when I visited Hungary where everything is drowning in glorious paprika. This fact is partially made up for by their liberal application of dumplings to any random meal. The Czechs can make a dumpling stand up and dance. This is why if a meal involves any type of sauce there are usually dumpling with it.
◊ Still, slices of doughy bread are not enough to get me to praise traditional Czech cuisine. They even manage to make nontraditional foods bland somehow. Kebabs, which are kind of like spicy gyros, can be found everywhere in Europe. For good reason, too. They are wonderful and cheap (as long as you are not in Switzerland). The Czech Republic is the only place I have been to where there is not a store selling them every few blocks. In fact, I have not seen a single place offering them aywhere in the country; only their bland cousin the gyro.
◊ There is only one food found only here that I will miss beyond words when I go home, smazney syr. Describing smazney syr is not very hard, but reading about it just does not do it justice. Somewhere along the disaster that has been the development of Czech cuisine they mastered the art of fried cheese. Imagine a giant square chese stick about one inch thick. This is served on a bun usually with mayonaise and sometimes comes with fries. It is like a little bit of heaven in each bite. When cooked right the cheese is the same consistency throughout: not burning liquid death, not cold chunk cheese, just right. They are magnificent beyond the words of meer mortals. The only thing that is an improvment oupon smazney syr is syr and pivo. They just go hand in hand. Think of it in terms of beer and pizza, or beer and programming. I am beginning to suspect that they put drugs in those things. Some things in life are just too good to be legal.
◊ Why am I bringing this up now? Today I went for a long walk and on my way back I was near Wenceslass Square, the mecca of cheap smazney syr, so I dropped in and grabbed a late lunch. Then, at dinner tonight in the menza, I was shocked to see smazney syr was the only choice. When I mentioned this to Ricardo, who was with me, he asked what I was going to do? Would I go away in disgust? Would I get the soup? (Always a questionable course of action.) Would I just eat yogurt? I answered his question by joyfully picking up my plate of potatoes and fried cheese. The moral of this story? One can never have to much smazney syr.